So this is my first blogging attempt. I thought I already picked a title for this blog but it just asked me for another one. Do blogs have two titles normally? So as I am reading my friends' blogs, I really feel like I am opening up their heads and crawling inside their brains. I don't know if I am ready to bear my soul in that way for everyone to peer into. I do battle some demons, but I tend to keep them pretty much to myself. I don't know why that is, because normally I am a pretty open person. Guess in my old age of 28.5 I am becoming less reliable on others to solve problems that I should figure out on my own. Or maybe I am realizing the demons have won and I should just give up. That doesn't sound good, I am a proud Catholic and God is a huge part of my everyday life. Okay, this blog is not going in the direction I had hoped...so let me write what I was really thinking about writing.
My life is pretty great right now...I have an amazing one year old son, a husband that I am very much in love with, wonderful family and friends. We are financially stable, have a solid roof over our heads and food on our table every night...and I am even getting to quit my full time job on March 1st! The only problem is, I keep waiting for something bad to happen. I know that sounds awful, but I think to myself...why me? What did I do to deserve such happiness? I am truly thankful every single day and am very well aware of what I have. I take many moments out of every day to thank God for all he has given me and pray for those who are not as fortunate. But I think, why am I able to quit working full time when some of my other friends can't? Why am I safe and secure when there is so much horror in the middle eastern and african countries? Why am I blessed with a healthy and beautiful child when other people suffer the tragic loss of a child? Maybe all these thoughts that run through my head everyday are good, I am not so caught up in my perfect world, blind to all that is sad in the rest of it. Well, there you go, you got inside my head and were able to crawl right up there in my brain full of never resting thoughts. Now can anyone out there tell me if they feel the same way?
Until next time, pray for peace and God Bless!
3 comments:
you are very sweet, you have all of these things because you deserve them. I am so fortunate to have you as my best friend.
I can't believe you didn't tell me yesterday you are reading my blog! lol yer so sneaky!
ps - " my first time" sounds like you're about to describe your first time lol
Hey, you just blogged all over the place. Nice.
wait, are you reading my blog too? if you are, i'm gonna have to start watching what i say! just kidding :) i second what jamie said ... you have all these blessings in your life because of what an amazing person you are. you deserve them! karma repays those who have it coming to them, both in good and bad ways. try to stop worrying and enjoy every minute for what's it worth!
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